Surviving...

We made it through Christmas and we're plodding through vacation. All of the commitments are over; no more presents to buy and only one thing to return. The kids are still here and relatively happy. Nothing has broken (*yet*) and I WENT TO THE GYM THIS MORNING AT 5:30 am!!!

Boy, am I superior - or at least I felt that way for the 45 minutes I spent getting through my weights. It was a LOT of work to get there, but I would LOVE to make it a habit. I need to get back into a regular schedule of exercise - my mind and body have suffered these last few months.

Oh, and my weight increased to 188 over the Christmas week. I will say that I got a case of the "*&%$- its" as my sisters and I call it. I ate a lot of chocolate and cheese; probably my 2 favorite foods on earth. I paid for it by gaining, but I am down to 187 this morning, and I hope I've learned my lesson. I won't make my 10 by New Years Challenge --- unless I get a really bad case of ... yah, I won't go there. 2009 will be better--- right ? At least I am starting it weighing 10 lbs less than I did last year and that will have to do.

Snow and No School = Stress

I am NOT going to eat. I keep telling myself that over and over. I am pissed that they cancelled school. I have NO idea how I am going to keep 2 overly stimulated Christmas-wanting kids entertained and not killing each other for the next 5 days. The Santa threat is just not cutting it anymore. Luckily I get to work Sunday afternoon (if they don't close the library b/c of yet another storm) and I am guarding at the YMCA Monday - Wednesday morning. A break from the chaos that is my life should help guard my last thread of sanity.

I am supposed to go to WW tomorrow a.m. SUPPOSED to sounds like I am not going, but I will dig myself out and make it there somehow. I will not put this off any longer. The week has been good, but not great. I really need a kick, but I guess I'll have to settle for 12" of snow to be shoveled.

No More Excuses…

I started thinking yesterday that losing 10 pounds by the New Year was no longer feasible; given my party/travel weekend and the fact that I am too afraid to get on the scale to see the damage. I had even considered *gasp* NOT going to WW this weekend, because I did not want to risk seeing a gain. That’s pretty stupid, I know, and the more I fight with myself, the more I realize that I am my worst enemy. My weight fluctuates because I don’t stick to a plan. I know It’s up because I ate too much of the wrong kind of food. I don’t know exactly how much it is up because I don’t get on the scale (as if not seeing a number makes it less real). I know that I haven’t been very thoughtful about exercise and if I don’t get a grip pretty soon, I will find it that much harder to get back to where I was, let alone improve my fitness.

I always get a plan together. Usually it is in my head; usually I forget halfway through the day or find a reason for not following through. Yesterday, I decided to put money on the line. I registered for all of my 2009 races and I signed up for a 6 week – 6 a.m. boot camp. For those of you who race, you know that we are talking some real bucks and I dread the January credit card statement. One race is international distance and that makes me realize that I will have to train much more seriously than I ever have. Yes, life will get in the way, but I need to incorporate my needs into what I consider vital to my family. I know it can only make me a better mom-wife-friend.

I am going to WW this weekend. I am following the plan this week (2 great days so far) and if a loss is in the cards- great! If it’s not, I have a new starting point. No more excuses!!!!!!

Re-Grouping ...

I just spent the better part of the weekend in the car or with my in-laws; neither of which is good for my diet. On the road I had french fries, 2 donuts and a MUFFIN (aka cake with a hat on). I wanted to diet - I wanted to be good, but I just wasn't. My sister in law is an enigma. She has 4 kids under 7, works full time and hates to cook. That said, she prepared enough food (or bought enough pre-prepared food) to feed several hundred people, and there were about 30 at the party. She is also thin - the only one in her family to be thin. I don't get it.

My downfall at the party - FONDUE. I suppose it would not have been bad if I dunked veggies instead of bread. I just couldn't stay away!!! Yesterday I woke with the worst stomach problems - pay back. I vowed to get myself together so I can weigh in Saturday. I have 5 more days to undo the damage --- AND show a loss for the last 2 weeks. I don't want to be gaining weight on Weight Watchers!!! SO no weigh in this week because I was gone (in all sense of the word).

I have to work for a friend tomorrow. I have to drive 2 hours to pick up my dog. I have little time for exercise. I need to get this part of my life back on track. I haven't gone this long without steady exercise for 6 years!!!!! I can't let it go on much longer!! SOMEONE PLEASE KICK MY BUTT!

The 24 day Plan

I have 24 days left of 2008. I have 7 pounds to lose to make my goal of 10 lbs.

The best way to succeed is not by hoping or winging it. The best way is to have a plan and to follow it. I joined Weight Watchers and they gave me an eating plan and now here it is week 3 and I’ve decided to follow it. I have a journal, I am looking up points values for the foods I eat and I am making a menu for our meals. I went to killer muscle fitness class Saturday morning and I will spin either tomorrow or Wednesday. I had planned to walk the dog this morning, but 9 degrees was too cold for both of us, so that’s been pushed off til this afternoon.

I have a strategy for dealing with a weekend trip to PA for a holiday party. I will not eat anything fried on the road (no french fries, no garbage). I will be mindful of what I eat and how much; I will write it all down and keep track of my points. NO NUTS – they are something I cannot control myself with… I know if I stay mindful of my plan, I will be able to stay in control. That should result in a loss, right?

In addition, I’ve decided to tone down my holiday stress level. I am thinking about ditching the holiday cards this year. I am thinking about buying an appetizer for the party rather than making something. It’s all the little things that get under my skin, and I am SO done with stressing over stupid stuff. PEACE and JOY are my mantras.

Week 3 - Down 2 lbs

I am happy to report a 2 lb loss. That's 3.2 lbs total and 6.8 to go for the year to reach my goal. Will I get my crap together this week? Stay tuned.

Grumpy and Apathetic...

If only I could have a dose of motivation --- PLEASE!!!

I need to get a jump start with my weight loss. I haven't been eating horribly, but I really can't say that I am counting my points. I NEED to journal; I know it works; and yet... I need to exercise. I have all these plans, but if I choose not to follow through plans mean NOTHING.

It's frustrating. I am not a happy camper these days. I am feeling very unappreciated. I am feeling overwhelmed at times. I also have been spending a lot of time by myself or with my kids. I definately can see that I have cut myself off from friends. I complain that it is just the winter; but maybe it's more than that. I need to really push myself to do more for me. I need to not care if my house is clean. It would make much more sense to go to spin 2x week.

And I have a cold that has kept me from sleeping for the better part of a week. Can it get any better?

TGI-Monday!

Kids are on the bus to school, I have 3 hours to myself for the first time in a week. I also have a monster cold, but I will not let it get the best of me.

I have to finish Xmas shopping. As I have said before, I hate all things commercial and I consider it an awful chore to have to buy STUFF. I also have to commit to next season's races. I can't believe I have to shell out cash now for something I won't do for 8 months!

Anyway, I need to get a grip on eating -writing things down and EXERCISING. I have just been so slug-like and un-motivated. If I make it to the race this weekend I will give myself a prize. If I lose more than 2 lbs; I'll give myself a bigger prize. I know I can do what I set my mind to doing...